when a finger of doubt just lays on you..........

i personally don't like people pointing out things to me..........especially from someone who doesn't know and doesn't even respect what i am.........

this is not about having a high opinion about yourself...this is as basic as just knowing youself well......atleast well enough to have a clarity of perspective and character.........

it is not about people basically doing that....its more bout those people doing it when you expect them to know you........closest of the people..........

for a moment at least it feels like a failure when you spend each day and each moment trying to make a better person of urself.........and all the more when these things are not just a piece of philosophical litany for you but something you really believe in............

and you just dont know how to convince them...

when u dont know where to go

i come back again to think of the title of my blog

life's a haze..........a thick haze where you cant see beyond the uncertainty except accepting what is given to you..........

things come to a standstill after a rollercoaster ride and an ecstatic feeling.........you hold on to it so tight and you don't want to let it go....its just then you feel it slipping out of your hand......

probably you always knew ...just din't know it enough to let it go...........everything then seems so ephemeral and meaningless......and u think why it happened in the first place when never had to stay ........you just dont know why should u be holding on to a mere feeling of yours.......

life seems meaningless and you just stop to take a breath of fresh air....flush things out to ease but that doesnt help too.......you talk, brood , cry, make urself feel miserable......whats all that for ....just for love.........when you put its this way...it might sound mechanical...........which certainly isn't the case at all...............because there is no rationality in the vicinity of irrational....no matter how much you try to relate them.........they break ties without any signs...........

life is not easy i feel today when it comes to personal facets...........it's just so vague.........what should really be done then............just let things come and rattle your life.......

i dont find that convincing enough........